Reailty Check: When is being the side chick okay?

 Lately a few of our favorite shows have been showing the highs and lows of being the, other woman, also known as the side chick. With shows like Being MaryJane and Scandal you see prominent women in society being in a full on semi-committed relationship with a married man. The passionate love and the emotions that goes into being in these relationship. draw us in week, after week. We all love these shows (myself included) but it makes me wonder if women are really okay with being the other woman aka side chick in a "relationship"?

We've all played the role of the other woman (side chick) and held out hope that the man would leave the woman he's with for you, but in reality does that ever really happen? 9 times out of 10 no it doesn't.  They may not of been married men, but it was a man that in a relationship that you knew about and/or didn't know about.

When it happened to me (deep sigh it happens to the best of us) I felt like I was in competition with someone else and I was always questions my feelings and his feelings. It took over my mind and body. I physically became overwhelmed with what he was doing or they were doing. In the end I left the relationship and never looked back because if he was for me then he would of told me up front about her and  he would of left her immediately to be with me. Even if he would of told me about her I probably would of ended it right there.

I hate to break it to the women that think and believe that their lives will some how take the path that Olivia and Mary Jane's has...but in all honesty it won't. You will never get the same benefits that the wife will have. You have to look at yourself and ask the question, if the roles were reversed how would you feel?  What is the ultimate prize that these men get from being with a single attractive successful woman? Men are intrigued by the fact that they can have relationships with women and not have any strings attached or a commitment.

To answer the question, when is being the side chick ok? It's never okay. You will always have to worry about if his feeling are true or not. As it did with me, thoughts will take over and it will have an effect on everything you do. My word of advice would be if you can't find that ideal man you are looking for, take a look at yourself first and understand YOU, then you will be equipped with all the necessary things that will attract that man that is designed to fit you and the life that you want to live. Also don't go looking for a man, nothing drives me crazy than ladies that feel like they can't live without a man. The right man will find you, when you least expect it. Cliche, but it's true.

Wives are taking note from these shows just like you are, so they are more prepared and ready to take on the challenge when it seems like their man is attempting or about to cheat.